My daily writing streak is 12 days long now. The numbers continue to be minuscule, but I’m excited to be writing daily again. I know, I know, it seems weird to be excited to have written 65 words, but it’s not a 0 on my spreadsheet and these last few days have felt like 0 word days so I feel lucky that I don’t have 0s on my spreadsheet.
That said, I hope I’m not done for the day. I really need to get back to some real writing.
It’s time to raise my daily writing expectations. That’s not to say I’m raising my required daily writing, just my expectations. If that’s possible. I mean, I hope it is. I don’t want to damage my progress, but the fact is, deadlines are looming—and fast. :o I need to write more than 50 or 100 or even 200 words a day, and I need to get started on that ASAP so I don’t screw up the last half of the year.
Also, I’m going to have to power through something that just isn’t working for me in the novella that just won’t end and deal with the consequences. That book has so not been worth it and I have no idea what happened.
Or maybe I do. I’m not writing what I thought I was writing. I stumbled over the focus of the story, and I’ve never recovered. I’ve gotten all tangled up in a rushed ending and I can’t see my way out. It’s like my brain is on a rail and I can’t get off. I keep looking for a different track—I’ve deleted thousands of words trying to backtrack and take a different rail, but I can’t reset my focus. So I’ve been trying to force things. As my current writing woes will attest, that hasn’t worked out well for me, and it’s bleeding over into everything I write until I just don’t even want to write.
I should abandon the book. I know I should. But I don’t want to. I want it done, so I can move on. Otherwise it will haunt me.
I’m serious. It will haunt me.